Most awesome Stone ever!

[Eadee]

I just bought a useless Rock in the shop to have an unimpressive paperweight.

But after the purchase I realised I was tricked. Not only was the Rock completely weightless, no, its the most awesome Rock in the entire Existence of Rockiness.
Its so awesome my papers would crumble to ash from the heat of excitement if I'd put it on them.

Long story short, the Rock seems to be completely Useless (just like in the description!) and I don't need it any more.

Therefore I decided to sell the most awesome Rock in history for as less as 500 EC. So if you're interested have a look in the trades-section.

However don't make the same mistake as I did. Its not a simple Rock... its goddamn awesome!
</ >

[Unorthodox]

Temporarily forgot which forum I was in, was expecting someone's tombstone...

[Buster's Uncle]

I own three Rocks - two were gifts.

[Eadee]

Well, it would make a great tombstone.

And hey BUncle, you seem to be a Rock-collector. Seriously you shouldn't let pass this opportunity to get the most awesome Rock in your collection!

[Buster's Uncle]

Gosh; I got to be a champion EC gadzillionaire by being a cheap SOB.

Tell me, friend Eadee, tell us all what's so awesome about your rock, why we should want it, why it's better than the other rocks.  A good pitch might be worth 500EC to you.

[Yitzi]

Gosh; I got to be a champion EC gadzillionaire by being a cheap SOB.

I thought it was by posting a lot.

[Buster's Uncle]

Hard work and thrifty savings, yessiree bob.  I could buy in the Shop to hog the top buyer spot without even beginning to dip noticeably into my EC lead on Imagine a Cool Name, yet I have no interest in doing so.

[Eadee]

Tell me, friend Eadee, tell us all what's so awesome about your rock, why we should want it, why it's better than the other rocks.  A good pitch might be worth 500EC to you.

Well, I wrote a whole paper this day to tell you how awesome it is. But then I realised that you have no reason to trust in my words since I'm still a recently joined stranger. So I deleted the file and decided to let seven People talk for me... people you know well for many years.
Here's what they say about that Rock:

: It took us many years to fully understand Planet... we made mistakes despite all our efforts since planetfall. But finally Planet spoke to and through me. Its different with this Rock. I saw it and it spoke to me instantly. It literally screamed out how awesome it is, and how awesome I will be when I posses it finally. But I am in a symbiosis with planet already, and there is only so much even an enlightened mind can take. So sadly I have to pass on this opportunity.

  : The Rock. In its perfection it mirrors our dreams but at the same time it has a devastating influence on our society. Its awesomeness awakens greed even in those who thought they successfully transcendet any individualism. When we learned about this new threat to our people we instantly sent out all probe teams we could spare to trick the morganites into reaching for the Rock. Finally the day has come when their greed puts the final nail into their coffin.

  : After centuries of study on quantum theory we finally ripped out the heart of mystery in this universe. We were such fools. The Awesomeness of THIS Rock, defies all laws of nature and all laws of quantum mechanics (not to speak of common sense). Yesterday we tried to understand the universe. Today, we have a superior goal. We have to understand THIS Rock at all cost.

  : The Rock belongs to me. It always did and it always will. The fact that others seem to be in possesion doesn't matter at all, the mere existence of this Rock inspired a new conflict over a single extremely restricted ressource. And conflict leads to action, action requires transaction and it is I who profits from EVERY transaction on Planet. So go for it, give in to your greed and grab it. Finally, it still is mine since it carries out my will at all times.

  : There is no thing in existence that better resembles the virtues of the spartan mind: Be hard. Keep it simple. Be independend. But remember: You do not need to own this Rock to embody its lessons. As soon as you learned all you can from this Rock, you have to show that you do not depend on it either, or else all of its teachings were in vain.

  : Since the epihany of the Rock we expierience schism in our ranks. The opinions differ a lot, on how this new divine presence of awesome alters our fate, our ways or the ways of the creator himself. Is this Rock the proof for gods existence? Did he create this Rock so heavy that he can't lift it himself but lifts it anyways to proove his omnipotence once and for all? The many questions that arise try to cloud our minds. But finally we all believe that only God knows what reasons he had to send us this Rock, be it a trial or be it a prophet.

  : We have to consider our actions carefully. This recently discovered Rock induces turmoil in the united people of Planet. It may be the greatest test to our skills as peacekeepers. But not only can we handle any future conflicts with confidence if we solve this one, we also have the chance to write history. We live in the days of THE Rock, generations will come and generations will go. But the tales of the actions we take in this time will last for as long as humanity does itself.

Finally I realised that in all the years you became familiar with these seven, you probably also learned not to trust any one of them. So since my efforts to get them to offer their thoughts to you might be in vain. But I ensure you no nerve stapling, mind control probes or torture was involved to get these statements. And that this one Rock is indeed the most awesome Rock you'll ever encounter.

Disclaimer: No mind worms were harmed in the making of this post.

[Buster's Uncle]

1.) Those guys are, indeed, full of crap.  It's just a darn rock.

2.) That's a pretty dog-on good pitch, what I wanted, and deserves rewarding.  I'm gonna make a Bank withdrawal to get my in-pocket liquidity adequate and go have a look...

---

Gamera, I hope you're talking note; Eadee is thinking along the exact right lines we want, and this is definitely to be encouraged, don't you think?

[Buster's Uncle]

$#@!  "ERROR: That item is not up for trade!"  It is, too; clicking on Buy Now got me that message.

-Betcha this is over my tech paygrade, but I'll look into it...

[Eadee]

2.) That's a pretty dog-on good pitch, what I wanted, and deserves rewarding.  I'm gonna make a Bank withdrawal to get my in-pocket liquidity adequate and go have a look...

Excellent!
</burns>

$#@!  "ERROR: That item is not up for trade!"  It is, too; clicking on Buy Now got me that message.

-Betcha this is over my tech paygrade, but I'll look into it...

Damn! It seems the trade mechanics can't handle the pure awesomeness :o

[Buster's Uncle]

FWIW, you'll note that my pocket worth did just increase by 1,000EC.  Why don't you gift me the rock and I'll gift you 500EC?

I'll get someone techie to look into the trade problem.  I looked and found no shop admin options to enable trade; I -or someone- needs to put something else up for trade to see if it's a rock-specific problem...

[Eadee]

FWIW, you'll note that my pocket worth did just increase by 1,000EC.  Why don't you gift me the rock and I'll gift you 500EC?

[    ]"I am not your personal moneylender, Transcend BUncle."
[ x ]"Agreed. But if you rob me you shall feel my wrath."
[    ]"I can lend you half of that, and no more."

[Buster's Uncle]

[Eadee]

Did the Artifact reach your base? Or did it get captured?