Alpha Centauri Puns

[JMN4444]

Alpha Centauri is a pretty philosophical and deep game. So why not let's add a little light into it by making puns about it .
 
I'll start:
The Progenitors have a new secret weapon in their arsenal; and no it's not a string disruptor. What I'm talking about is that they have adopted a new way of fighting. Now the Caretakers have adopted MAGIC in their society under their stalwart and wise ruler:

H'MIONEE GRANGER

: Manifold six: magic: bizzare elemental manipulation. Progenitor: approves.



I heard that the Peacekeepers are going Free Market. They even revealed their secret on why their bases have extra talents .
Without further ado, they give you:
  THE LALLIPOP

• Comes in 3 Flavors: Liberty, Freedom and Democracy.
• Enhances brain power and physical capabilities.
• Rich in vitamins and minerals to help you survive the harsh conditions of Planet.
• Results are felt after 5 days!
• Approved by the Chiron Health Association.

For only 30 energy credits, this unique sweet will help you achieve talenthood in no time! Liberate your minds now with the LALLIPOP.

 : This is a very great insult to The Hive. Vendetta upon you Lal! Your so called "product" will be buried along the rest of your misguided ideology.



Feel free to add more :

[JMN4444]

Holy crap, never have I been right all along this entire time! While I was playing as  , I saw that  was taking the lead against everyone by a long shot! The Caretakers were indeed practicing SORCERY all along!
Anyhow, about for the puns I'll try to think of some more in the long run  (If I still can)
Again, feel free to add more if you wish !

[Geo]

Ever heard of Morganic Superlub?
Now available for all your bedchamber needs...

You really need to keep an eye on it though.
't Will slide away from you first change it gets...

[JMN4444]

It seems that Morgan Industries seems to be heavily advertising these days. Heck I've heard that MorganTv has a new cartoon show in their channels known as "Gravitonics Falls" where Pines and Pines solve the mysteries of the Morgan Shack  .