Alpha Centauri 2

Community => Recreation Commons => Topic started by: Unorthodox on March 01, 2013, 03:22:01 PM

Title: How I created a monster.
Post by: Unorthodox on March 01, 2013, 03:22:01 PM

I've been posting about this for 10 years, so some of you may have heard parts of it before.  This morning I witnessed an update to the situation, and decided to give it's own thread here. 


13 years ago, I got put in charge of a particular project, of which involved a property.  Specifically, a warehouse building in an industrial complex. 

This building was completely infested by pigeons.  Hundreds, everywhere.  While an annoyance, the govt wouldn't pay for removal, nor would my company.  So, I decided to take matters into my own hands, and I started feeding them every morning. 

Within 3 months, they were trained to expect the food at the proper time every day, so I started bringing my sling shot and blow gun.  Feed the birds, kill one.  The next morning, the corpse was always eaten.  I figured a cat or other scavenger, didn't think too much on it at the time. 

6 months later, I found the culprits.  A family of crows, only 10 of them at the time.  They had come to find out the time, and would sit patiently until the pigeons had eaten, then swoop down and consume the corpse.  I was fascinated to be able to watch it happen. 

This went on for about a year, and the pigeon numbers were dwindling.  I'd only get 5 or so a day to come eat, and the building was getting clean.  Then it happened. 

Those crows did not wait for me to kill, they took it upon themselves.  They were covering the rooftops at the appointed time, watch me spread the food, and DESTROYED the first pigeon to arrive.  I simply watched in awe.  Couple months went by and there were no more pigeons, and I started feeding the crows, because I liked the crows.  They would show up every day.  8 years, this went on.  Occasionally another bird would come eat and the crows would kill it, and I would chuckle.   The family had grown into a respectible murder of about 50 or so in that time. 

Then we shut the building down. 

I moved on to another project, and those crows were left to fend for themselves. 

2 years ago, I went back to the area, and utterly shocked by what I witnessed. 

The murder had grown to several hundred.  But, that was not the shocking thing.  They had LEARNED. 

I had stopped by the nearby gas station when I had seen them.  There was a McDonalds across the street, and they had taken roost on trees and power lines nearby. 

It was not shocking to see them picking through the trash, really, that's just crows.  However, these birds were pulling out food and dumping it all over the parking lot.   ???

So I decided to wait and watch.  At first light, seagulls came to eat the fries scattered about the parking lot.  Twice the size of the crows, they stood no chance against the numbers. 

I drove by this morning.  There were THOUSANDS, every tree, lamp, and wire within sight was COVERED.  And they were harrassing the people carrying the trash towards the dumpster.   ;uno

Title: Re: How I created a monster.
Post by: Buster's Uncle on March 01, 2013, 03:25:42 PM

You must be very proud.

Title: Re: How I created a monster.
Post by: Unorthodox on March 01, 2013, 06:19:31 PM

I have a special fondness for Corvids, yes. 

Trained a crow when I was a child, he was awesome, could talk, trained to fetch shiny objects.   Turned out that's illegal, and he's now in a local sanctuary where he's part of a bird show.  There's still a few tricks he won't do for anyone else, though, and I occasionally get to go play with him still, but he's getting up there in age, and don't expect that to last much longer. 

We annoy the neighbors as I have roosting magpies every year.  Most consider them an annoyance, what with their tendency to kill songbirds and all, I just love them, happily share what corn they eat, and they keep the annoying song birds away from the house that would wake my wife up after working nights.   :D  Our pair, I saved the male from a cat, and it's recognized me ever since.  It will even eat from my hand, but no one else. 

He did get rather pissed when he got sick from eating Steve though.  Disappeared for a month, and chewed me out when he first appeared back.  It was hilarious.  Lesson learned, watch what kind of oil I use to stain.  Linseed base attracts corvids. 

Title: Re: How I created a monster.
Post by: testdummy653 on March 01, 2013, 06:28:25 PM

When I first read the story I misread crow, for cow... Made for an interesting couple of paragraphs

Title: Re: How I created a monster.
Post by: JarlWolf on March 28, 2013, 12:35:22 AM

I think you've made the Crows of Diomedes.

Or if you really want to be a nutball fan of SMAC, paint the crows yellow and then call them the Locusts of Chiron.

Title: Re: How I created a monster.
Post by: Geo on March 28, 2013, 03:19:59 PM

Now I'm wondering, what's huntin' crows?

Title: Re: How I created a monster.
Post by: JarlWolf on March 29, 2013, 10:58:28 AM

Quote from: Geo on March 28, 2013, 03:19:59 PM

Now I'm wondering, what's huntin' crows?

Nothing, they got the whole system pigeonholed.

Title: Re: How I created a monster.
Post by: Unorthodox on March 29, 2013, 03:35:00 PM

It's seasonal, too.  So, it might take people a while to figure that out.  They form those huge mobs only in the late winter/early spring, after that they spread out and other forms of food become more abundant. 

Title: Re: How I created a monster.
Post by: Rusty Edge on April 02, 2013, 08:42:08 PM

Quote from: Geo on March 28, 2013, 03:19:59 PM

Now I'm wondering, what's huntin' crows?

Awesome story, Uno.

I can guess. Nothing is hunting crows, or nothing effectively.

I hunted crows on our farm.  They have three things going for them.
1) Intelligence. Uno has already demonstrated that.
2) Eyesight. They see better, they have a better vantage point in a tree or from the air, they have eyes on the sides of their heads.
3) Co-operation. They are a family that works together & communicates, like a pod of whales, a pack of wolves, or a pride of lions.

Put that all together, and they're hard to beat. Sure, owls will eat their brains while they sleep. Sure, good hunters in camoflouge with decoys can kill them, but neither will make a dent in the population. It takes something like habitat destruction or West Nile Virus.

The crows know the difference between me with a rifle and me with a shovel, and will spread the alarm and keep their distance accordingly. Really, they mostly scavenge. The worst crop damage they did was scratching open ears of corn in the milk stage in a drought year, and that seemed to be mostly for moisture. /then the bugs got in and ate the rest of it. I can't blame the crows for trying to survive, although in a drought year I needed every bushel.

Anyway, accomplished as I may have been with my rifle at long range, the crows were quick studies, and I only shot a couple of them before they wised up, and they remembered for years. So it was mostly a matter of being conspicuos with my rifle to get crows I never would have seen to leave. They recognized me and spread the word.  Call it truce, or a stand-off. They didn't do much crop damage anymore, and neither did I harm them. We just sort of annoyed one another once in a while, and everybody earned a living.

Title: Re: How I created a monster.
Post by: Unorthodox on April 02, 2013, 09:23:31 PM

Quote from: Rusty Edge on April 02, 2013, 08:42:08 PM

Quote from: Geo on March 28, 2013, 03:19:59 PM

Now I'm wondering, what's huntin' crows?

Awesome story, Uno.

I can guess. Nothing is hunting crows, or nothing effectively.

I hunted crows on our farm.  They have three things going for them.
1) Intelligence. Uno has already demonstrated that.

Freakish intelligence. 

http://www.cracked.com/article_19042_6-terrifying-ways-crows-are-way-smarter-than-you-think.html (http://www.cracked.com/article_19042_6-terrifying-ways-crows-are-way-smarter-than-you-think.html)

Title: Re: How I created a monster.
Post by: Rusty Edge on April 02, 2013, 10:10:04 PM

THAT IS FREAKY. I figured they could see I was carrying brass or something.

I'm not sure which is freakier- that they are as clever as they are OR that they share information as much as they do. 

SKYNET may be a potential peril, but I'm sure it will crashlike CFC.

Crows on the other hand, can be expected to improvise and adapt.


So while I was off doing laundry, garbage, etc. I had another  thought.
I imagined that a century from now scientists contemplating the mystery of how predatory crows eradicated the pigeons in the cities, will stumble across this thread in a search to discover the earliest documented  example of such squab-loving behavior.

The sub-spiecies shall be renamed Corvus Unorthodoxus.

Title: Re: How I created a monster.
Post by: JarlWolf on April 06, 2013, 10:21:23 AM

(http://i1128.photobucket.com/albums/m494/JarlWolf/Crowborg_zpsc0116c6d.png)

...Always adapting... always evolving....

Title: Re: How I created a monster.
Post by: Unorthodox on April 07, 2013, 04:00:54 PM

My magpies returned from migration yesterday.  Took up roost on their tree, chased away all the song birds and flitted down on the fence next to me when I went outside, started jawing at me.  Don't know what they're saying, probably how their winter went. 

Or they're still mad about the whole fake corpse thing. 

Title: Re: How I created a monster.
Post by: Buster's Uncle on April 07, 2013, 05:02:42 PM

Like the neighbors?

Title: Re: How I created a monster.
Post by: Geo on April 08, 2013, 06:46:48 PM

Well, since they are his seasonal neighbours...  :P

Title: Re: How I created a monster.
Post by: Unorthodox on April 08, 2013, 08:26:06 PM

Speaking of...

The new neighbors moved in the other day while I was testing the Plan B sound system.  Curious what they were thinking with the Chimera out front and tribal drum musi being blared. 

They have a little boy about Talia's age. 

Title: Re: How I created a monster.
Post by: Buster's Uncle on April 08, 2013, 08:29:38 PM

-Gonna go out on a limb here, and guess they thought you're weird.

Title: Re: How I created a monster.
Post by: Unorthodox on April 08, 2013, 08:46:12 PM

Maybe.  There's a decent chance they actually KNOW someone in the neighborhood and have heard of us before.  That Mormon gossip wagon and all. 

Title: Re: How I created a monster.
Post by: Buster's Uncle on April 08, 2013, 08:55:45 PM

Maybe?

I support/admire your work, and I think you're weird.

Title: Re: How I created a monster.
Post by: Unorthodox on April 08, 2013, 08:58:25 PM

Hell, I think I'm wierd.  But then, who wants to be normal? 

Title: Re: How I created a monster.
Post by: Buster's Uncle on April 08, 2013, 09:26:47 PM

Nobody much here, I think.  I had to learn to stop working at being so unique.

Title: Re: How I created a monster.
Post by: Geo on April 09, 2013, 04:26:06 PM

Quote from: Unorthodox on April 08, 2013, 08:58:25 PM

Hell, I think I'm wierd.  But then, who wants to be normal?

 ;b;

Title: Re: How I created a monster.
Post by: Rusty Edge on April 09, 2013, 06:11:10 PM

Quote from: Unorthodox on April 08, 2013, 08:26:06 PM

Speaking of...

The new neighbors moved in the other day while I was testing the Plan B sound system.  Curious what they were thinking with the Chimera out front and tribal drum musi being blared.

The Crows, with their facial recognition, aerial surveilance,  secure communications network and multigenerational database consider Uno a friend and mentor. 

Gotta have your priorities.

Title: Re: How I created a monster.
Post by: Geo on May 16, 2013, 09:11:54 PM

And they report all to you, the Aerial Emperor?   :P

Title: Re: How I created a monster.
Post by: Buster's Uncle on May 16, 2013, 09:52:37 PM

I believe his proper title is The Thing in the Shadows, if you ask him (That Weird Guy, if you ask his neighbors).

Title: Re: How I created a monster.
Post by: Unorthodox on May 16, 2013, 10:09:09 PM

Quote from: BUncle on May 16, 2013, 09:52:37 PM

I believe his proper title is The Thing in the Shadows

Oh, that's GOOOD.   gotta remember that one. 



New building update:

They won't let me bring my blow darts up here.   :(  Pigeons and black birds both making a mess nesting just oustide the door, but fortunately not inside. 

Both crows and magpies spotted near, but they are very timid around people, it seems.  People around here must be feeding the pigeons and black birds and scaring away the corvids by the reactions I'm seeing from the groups. 

Afraid the crows are a lost cause this year, the black birds harass them when they get too close.  Working on the magpies.  If I can get them to be regulars, they'll chase off the black birds.  Then we can work on the pigeons. 

Title: Re: How I created a monster.
Post by: Buster's Uncle on May 17, 2013, 01:11:03 AM

Quote from: Unorthodox on May 16, 2013, 10:09:09 PM

Oh, that's GOOOD.   gotta remember that one.

:D

It just seemed right and fitting that you'd style yourself with the sense of menace, not the overt, blatant, (vulgar and boring) actuality.  Very you...