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A Reader's Theatre adaptation of a short story
from Rebecca Wells' Little Altars Everywhere

Directed by Dr. Kelly S. Taylor

Excerpt #1

 
 
Shep:  We were all over at Buggy's spending the night because my Daddy was off duck hunting and Mama didn't want to stay at Pecan Grove because of her nightmares.  We were all laid up in Buggy's den watching "Saturday Night at the Movies", eating peanut-butter fudge when that dog went into labor.  Buggy had set her up in the utility room with a heater and a transistor radio turned on, and we were reaching a high point in the movie when Miss Peppy started this high, sharp moaning.  I ran in there to see what was happening, and I tell you - it was truly something awful. l've seen plenty of puppies born at Pecan Grove and at my cousIns . It doesn't scare me.  But that dog was being ripped apart.  Made me glad I wasn't a girl.  We all hovered around, but we couldn't do a single thing to help her.

Mother:  Buggy got all upset and started lighting some novena candles and Mama yelled, Mother, stop being so sanctimonious!

Shep:  I said, Hey Mama, Dr. Fitzsimmons would know what to do.  He always knows what to do with Daddy's cows.

Mother: And Mama yelled out to Buggy, Blow out those damn candles and go warm up the car!

Shep:  Then I looked up the number, and Mama called Dr. Fitzsimmons' telephone-answering service.  I'm going to have me one of those when I'm a vet.  And I'll work on large and small animals, Just like Dr. FitzSimmons.

Buggy:  Buggy said, Oh, I'm scared to touch her!  I might cause her even more pain.

Shep: I scooped Miss Peppy up in her blanket because it didn't look like anyone else was going to make a move.

Dr. Fitzsimmons left a party just to meet us at the clinic, and he worked for two hours while we waited in the lobby that smelled like disinfectant.  Mama just smoked cigarettes and Buggy mumbled prayers under her breath.

Dr. Fitzsimmons:  Then Dr. Fitzsimmons came out with a lab coat over his slacks and said, Mrs. Abbott, Vivi, I'm real sorry.  I pulled the bitch through, but couldn't save the litter.  I recommend you spay her for her own health.

Buggy:  Buggy stood there sobbing and fingering her rosary and muttered, Don't you dare call Miss Peppy names.

Mother:  Mama said, Thank you for your good work, Dr. Fitzsimmons. We're lucky to have you in this town.


Buggy:  Buggy said, I suppose it's the will of Jesus.

Mother:  Mama said, Mother, did you hear what Dr. Fitzsimmons said about the hysterectomy?    

 
Buggy:  Yes, my grandmother snapped, Don't talk nasty.  Of course I heard.  I'm not deaf yet.  It will be taken care of.  We must think of the safety of the mother first and foremost.

 

Excerpt #2

Shep:It wasn't too long after Miss Peppy got spayed that Buggy started up with the baby dolls.  Her mission in life became to train that dog to treat those dolls like they were her own puppies.  We watch Buggy do it all the time.  She spends whole afternoons teaching Miss Peppy to carry those baby dolls around in her mouth.  She makes the dog drop them real gentle on Buggy's own bed, and then she teaches that animal to pull the covers up over them like they are actual human babies getting tucked in for a nap.


Buggy: Every time we go over there, Buggy has to show it off.  She says, Yall come see what a good mother Miss Peppy is! 

 
Shep:  And we have to troop into Buggy's bedroom, where she has this prayer kneeler she conned off some nun.  The kneeler is facing this Sacred Heart of Jesus bleeding like a stuck pig up there on the wall. There are still a couple stains on it from that time I smeared ketchup on the picture to make it look more real-like.  Off to the side of her bed Buggy has a statue of the Blessed Virgin Mary, with a bunch of flowers that Buggy picks fresh every day.     

 
Buggy: Just look at what a good mama Miss Peppy is!  Buggy says.  Can't yall Just imagine how proud the Blessed Mother is of her?     

 
Shep and Sidda: And she makes the dog tuck her "babies" under the covers over and over again, and we all have to say, Oh Buggy, that is wonderful, just wonderful.     

 
I whisper to Sidda, Buggy is nuts.  She belongs in the same asylum we're gonna drive Mama to.  And those dolls are butt-ugly.     

 
Buggy:  Buggy hears me whispering and she says, This is not pretend, yall hear Buggy?  This is one hundred percent true.  If yall just pretend those are Miss Peppy's babies, she'will know.  You can't just pretend, you really have to believe. "    

 
Shep and Sidda:  And we all look at each other like, Yeah, right, no wonder this dog is so weird.     

 
Shep:  I grin and lead Sidda, Lulu, and Baylor down the hall to the room where we sleep when we spend the night, and where all our toys are.  Once I have them all in there, I shut the door and tell them, Alright  now, listen to me, hear?  Yall want to have some fun?

 
Baylor:  Yeah!  Baylor says.

 
Lulu:  Uh-huh, Lulu says, chewing a piece of peanut-butter fudge.     

 
Sidda: Sidda takes the candy away from her and says, Mama told me to keep an eye on you.  You wouldn't have your weight problem in the first  place if it weren't for Buggy and her homemade candy.

Shep:  Shut up, I tell them.  Yall listen to me!

 
Sidda: Even Sidda listens because she's as bored as the rest of us. 

 
Shep:  I reach  down into the toy chest and pull out two dolls that Sidda and Lulu have  already ripped the hair off of.  One of their favorite things is to rip the  hair off their dolls and throw them up in the chinaberry tree and laugh at them.  

Yall see these dolls?  I ask. 


Sidda, Baylor, and Lulu:  Uh-huh, they nod. 

 
Shep: I am the leader, they're all listening to me.

These are Miss Peppy's new babies, I announce to them.

 
Sidda: What?  Sidda says.

 
Shep:  I repeat, These are the new babies of Miss Peppy.

Sidda:  Little Shep, Sidda says, what are you talking about?

Shep:  I'm not just talking!  I say proudly.  I am going to swap these bald-headed rubber dolls for Miss Peppy's babies and see what happens.

 
Lulu:  Lulu smiles and reaches into her pocket where she has more fudge stashed away.

Baylor:  Baylor starts giggling.

Sidda:  Sidda says, Shep, you know how Buggy is about that dog.  You're  gonna get us all in big trouble.  It's a great idea.

Shep:  I say, Yall leave it up to me. just leave it all up to old Little Shep.

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