A
Reader's Theatre adaptation of a short story
from Rebecca Wells' Little Altars Everywhere
Directed
by Dr. Kelly S. Taylor
Excerpt
#1
Shep: We were all over
at Buggy's spending the night because my Daddy was off duck hunting and
Mama
didn't want to stay at Pecan Grove because of her nightmares.
We were all
laid up in Buggy's den watching "Saturday Night at the Movies", eating
peanut-butter fudge when that dog went into labor. Buggy had
set her up
in the utility room with a heater and a transistor radio turned on, and
we were
reaching a high
point
in the movie when Miss Peppy started this high, sharp
moaning. I ran in
there to see what was happening, and I tell you - it was truly
something awful.
l've seen plenty of puppies born at Pecan Grove and at my cousIns . It
doesn't
scare me. But that dog was being ripped apart. Made
me glad I
wasn't a girl. We all hovered around, but we couldn't do a
single thing
to help her.
Mother:
Buggy got all
upset and started lighting some novena candles and Mama yelled, Mother,
stop
being so sanctimonious!
Shep:
I said, Hey Mama,
Dr. Fitzsimmons would know what to do. He always knows what
to do with
Daddy's cows.
Mother: And
Mama yelled out
to Buggy, Blow out those damn candles and go warm up the car!
Shep:
Then I looked up
the number, and Mama called Dr. Fitzsimmons' telephone-answering
service.
I'm going to have me one of those when I'm a vet. And I'll
work on large
and small animals, Just like Dr. FitzSimmons.
Buggy:
Buggy said, Oh,
I'm scared to touch her! I might cause her even more
pain.
Shep: I scooped Miss Peppy up
in her blanket because it didn't look like anyone else was going to
make a
move.
Dr.
Fitzsimmons left a party
just to meet us at the clinic, and he worked for two hours while we
waited in
the lobby that smelled like disinfectant. Mama just smoked
cigarettes and
Buggy mumbled prayers under her breath.
Dr.
Fitzsimmons: Then
Dr. Fitzsimmons came out with a lab coat over his slacks and said, Mrs.
Abbott,
Vivi, I'm real sorry. I pulled the bitch through, but
couldn't save the
litter. I recommend you spay her for her own
health.
Buggy:
Buggy stood
there sobbing and fingering her rosary and muttered, Don't you dare
call Miss
Peppy names.
Mother:
Mama said,
Thank you for your good work, Dr. Fitzsimmons. We're lucky to have you
in this town.
Buggy: Buggy said, I
suppose it's the will of Jesus.
Mother:
Mama said,
Mother, did you hear what Dr. Fitzsimmons said about the
hysterectomy?
Buggy: Yes, my
grandmother snapped, Don't talk nasty. Of course I
heard. I'm not
deaf yet. It will be taken care of. We must think
of the safety of
the mother first and foremost.
Excerpt
#2
Shep:It
wasn't too long after
Miss Peppy got spayed that Buggy started up with the baby
dolls. Her
mission in life became to train that dog to treat those dolls like they
were
her own puppies. We watch Buggy do it all the time.
She spends
whole afternoons teaching Miss Peppy to carry those baby dolls around
in her
mouth. She makes the dog drop them real gentle on Buggy's own
bed, and
then she teaches that animal to pull the covers up over them like they
are
actual human babies getting tucked in for a nap.
Buggy: Every time we go over
there, Buggy has to show it off. She says, Yall come see what
a good
mother Miss Peppy is!
Shep: And we have to
troop into Buggy's bedroom, where she has this prayer kneeler she
conned off
some nun. The kneeler is facing this Sacred Heart of Jesus
bleeding like
a stuck pig up there on the wall. There are still a couple stains on it
from that time I smeared ketchup
on the picture to make it look more real-like. Off to the
side of her bed
Buggy has a statue of the Blessed Virgin Mary, with a bunch of flowers
that
Buggy picks fresh every
day.
Buggy: Just look at what a
good mama Miss Peppy is! Buggy says. Can't yall
Just imagine how
proud the Blessed Mother is of
her?
Shep and Sidda: And she makes
the dog tuck her "babies" under the covers over and over again, and
we all have to say, Oh Buggy, that is wonderful, just
wonderful.
I whisper to Sidda, Buggy is
nuts. She belongs in the same asylum we're gonna drive Mama
to. And
those dolls are
butt-ugly.
Buggy: Buggy hears me
whispering and she says, This is not pretend, yall hear
Buggy? This is
one hundred percent true. If yall just pretend those are Miss
Peppy's
babies, she'will know. You can't just pretend, you really
have to believe.
"
Shep and Sidda: And we
all look at each other like, Yeah, right, no wonder this dog is so
weird.
Shep: I grin and lead
Sidda, Lulu, and Baylor down the hall to the room where we sleep when
we spend
the night, and where all our toys are. Once I have them all
in there, I
shut the door and tell them, Alright now, listen to me,
hear? Yall
want to have some fun?
Baylor: Yeah!
Baylor says.
Lulu: Uh-huh, Lulu
says, chewing a piece of peanut-butter
fudge.
Sidda: Sidda takes the candy
away from her and says, Mama told me to keep an eye on you.
You wouldn't
have your weight problem in the first place if it weren't for
Buggy and
her homemade candy.
Shep: Shut up, I tell
them. Yall listen to me!
Sidda: Even Sidda listens
because she's as bored as the rest of us.
Shep: I reach
down into the toy chest and pull out two dolls that Sidda and Lulu
have
already ripped the hair off of. One of their favorite things
is to rip
the hair off their dolls and throw them up in the chinaberry
tree and
laugh at them.
Yall see these dolls? I
ask.
Sidda, Baylor, and
Lulu: Uh-huh, they nod.
Shep: I am the leader,
they're all listening to me.
These are Miss Peppy's new
babies, I announce to them.
Sidda: What? Sidda
says.
Shep: I repeat, These
are the new babies of Miss Peppy.
Sidda: Little Shep,
Sidda says, what are you talking about?
Shep: I'm not just
talking! I say proudly. I am going to swap these
bald-headed rubber
dolls for Miss Peppy's babies and see what happens.
Lulu: Lulu smiles and
reaches into her pocket where she has more fudge stashed away.
Baylor: Baylor starts
giggling.
Sidda: Sidda says,
Shep, you know how Buggy is about that dog. You're
gonna get us all
in big trouble. It's a great idea.
Shep: I say, Yall leave
it up to me. just leave it all up to old Little Shep.
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