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Author Topic:   Operation Falling Water:pt. 1

Talon posted 11-29-98 01:55 PM ET
*Disclaimer*This story can only be continued by a member,citizen,monk (or whatever we're calling ourselves) from the Brotherhood of Sid. Any changes to this storyline will be ignored. Feel free to post reactions.
---------------------------------------------
-High Security meeting room, Sub-sub-sub-section 22D,BoS Headquarters
Imran Siddiqui, newly elected head of the Brotherhood of Sid convenes a secret meeting with his top military officers YYYH and Talon.
Imran:Yo
YYYH:Yo
Imran:Yo
YYYH:Hey!
Talon:Um...guys?
Imran:We're trying to have a conversation here!
YYYH:Yea! couldn't you tell?
Talon: uhh...sorry
Imran:Before I was so rudely interrupted, i was going to tell you the reason for the meeting.
Talon:Like what?
YYYH: You know the utter elimination of CWAL HV?
Talon: Oh yeah I knew that!
YYYH: Whatever Tal. Anyways Imran, what's on tap for today?
Imran: we've got Bud Light,Michelob,and some Labbats Blue we found in DJRRebel's office.
YYYH:That sounds good but I meant what's the plan?
Imran: That's the reason for the meeting. We need a plan. Any Ideas?
Talon:I could send in my planes and bomb them relentlessly.
YYYH: Or send in the blue alpacas named Bob to create some havoc and them use NIM8 on the survivors.
Imran: None of those sound good. How about we check the BoS computer archives.
(Imran scans through the search results)
Here's something. It was hidden deep inside BoS archive II. It's something called Operation Falling Water(wave two)
YYYH: Hey that's my plan.
Talon: Yeah I remember looking over a preliminary plan for that.
Imran: Alright we use O.F.W. I'm sending the details to you now. Imran Out.
---------------------------------------------
-Control Room,Flying Fortress"Raptor"-
Major Briggs:Here are the orders sir.
Talon: Let me see them
(Talon reads them over)
Looks all in order. Major, change course to GLCOMET1 and patch me through to Lt.Commanders Jay and Titans Bane.
Major Briggs:Yes sir, headed for GLCOMET1, Jay and Titans Bane are online.
Jay:Sir?
Talon:Jay, we have received orders to attack CWAL HV, prep Alpha and Delta squadrons for action and then report back to me.
Jay: Roger that. Jay Out.
Talon:Titans Bane where the hell have you been?
Titans Bane:I don't know thw last few days have been a blur.
Talon:Well get your **** together and report to NIMandier general YYYH for asignment. I'll meet you at GLCOMET1, move Czar1 to BEAGLE location.
Titans Bane: Roger that sir
Talon: Talon Out.
(Talon walks to his stateroom for some much needed rest)
---------------------------------------------
Once again replies are welcome. YYYH and Imran please add your own stories to this one.
-Talon
Cmr. of the BoS Airforce
Member?, Citizen?, Monk? of the BoS
Dark Nexus posted 11-29-98 03:18 PM ET
Nice. But for a second, I thought you were a shotgun-wielding, coffee-making brain in a jar............
Dark Nexus
"Sanity is calming, but madness is more interesting."
DarkLight posted 11-29-98 03:58 PM ET
Decent so far, but a slight bit of advice: Try putting spaces in between lines of dialogue. It make sit much easier to read.
Imran Siddiqui posted 11-29-98 08:02 PM ET
Main operation room - BoS Headquarters
Imran: Roy (the computer), Please give me some scematics on the new plans.
Roy: Wrrrrr... [Paper shooting out]
Imran stoops over an picks up the pages.
Imran: 200 pages!! Talon goes a little overboard at time doesn't he.
Roy: That's not all, I ran out of paper. I'm on page 200 of 1000.
Imran: What?! Ok, Ok, I'll throw out pages 2 to 999, it probably still be the same. I don't know why Talon decided to put every ones name in the damn scematics.
Imran turns to a man in blue.
Imran: Messenger, send this copy over to the NIMadier General, take you fastest rocket car!
Messenger: Yes, sir!
The Messenger disappears from view.
Imran: Get the NIMadier General on the phone!
Soldier: He's on the can, sir.
Imran: What, how do know that, do have contact to the front lines?
Solider: No, sir, he's still here.
Imran: Oh, for the love of God, I just sent a messenger out to... God Damn it!!
YYYH: Yes, sir, I heard you wanted me.
Imran: Um, yes, we are to attck here [Imran points to the map] and here. Initiate Operation Patton, join Operation Falling Water, after it is done.
YYYH: Sir, yes, sir!
Imran: Oh, by the way, if a messenger somes for you, take the scematics.
YYYH: But I already have them.
Imran: Just take them, and say thank you.
YYYH: Ok chief, your call.
Imran: Dismissed!
----------------------------------------
AUH2O: I almost have the terms ready, Mr. President
Imran: Good, good, let me see them when your through
AUH2O: No problem, sir.
Imran Siddiqui
Patriot
AUH20 posted 11-29-98 08:12 PM ET
AUH20 wanders into the room with a suitcase. he puts the case down, and pulls out several pieces of paper.
Au kay, guys, here's the terms of surrender for CWAL.
Imran:I wish you wouldn't just barge in like that, Dr. H2O.
Au h, sorry.
YYYH:EPA---Enforcement $0.33?
Au ops, wrong ministry. Sorry, it's not easy holding two upper-echelon jobs at once. Here. And do me a favor, don't show that to any of the Gaian members of the Brotherhood, okay?
YYYH:These are very-interesting...
Au: I'll read them for the full house.
We, the members of Can't Wait Any Longer(CWAL) hereby submit to the following terms and conditions set forth by the Brotherhood of Sid(BoS).
Item #1: All CWAL members shall henceforth wear toga's bearing the Firaxis logo on the back and the word's "Sid is a Genius." or "Firaxis knows when the hell to release games."
Item #2: The leaders of CWAL shall be recquired to take jobs as janitors at Firaxis headquarters, and shall volunteer for latrine duty whenever need be.
Item #3a: CWAL shall pay reperations to be determined at a later date for Firaxis for there raids against them.
Item #3b: CWAL shall pay reperations to be determined at a later date to SMACers for delays caused by Firaxis having to defend against raids.
Au:I'd welcome addenda. That's just a rough draft. Of course, if Yo's plan works, there won't be much time for addenda! BWAHAHA!
Imran:Uh...Au.
Au:Yes?
Imran:Your glasses fell of during the maniacal laugh again.
Au amn.
AuH2O then puts his glasses back on, and walks out of the room trying to preserve what little dignity he has left, picking up his copy of the budget on his way out.
AUH20 posted 11-29-98 08:14 PM ET
Oh, **** I forgot about the new faces. Here's a guide:
Okay
Oh
Oops
Damn
Yo_Yo_Yo_Hey posted 11-29-98 08:15 PM ET
(A rocket car pulls up)
Messenger: NIMadier general,
NIMadier general!!
YYYH: What do ya want!?!?!
Messenger: (heavy breathing) Sir, I have the schematics here!
YYYH: Schematics, what?? Give me those
(rips them out of the messengers hand)
YYYH: Now, off with ye!
Colonel K'nownothing: (whispering) Thank you, thank you!
YYYH: Oh yeah, thank you messenger!
Messenger: Any time sir!
(The messenger gets into the rocket car & drives off)
YYYH: ****in idiots in my army.....Colonel! How's the Salvation Army re-education coming?
Colonel K'nownothing: Well, sir it's goin' along ok, just that they still think they should give.
YYYH: Pchh, giving. You know how I feel about giving!
K;nownothing: Yes I do, it's your fault my wife & kids are starving in a box!!
YYYH: SHUTUP! Initiate Operation Patton now. You know what to do.
K'nownothing: Yes sir!
(The tanks all mobilize & drive towards Ohio, as the infantry marches to New Jersey)
Your faithful & hell-bent NIMadier general,
YYYH
Imran Siddiqui posted 11-29-98 08:25 PM ET
Imran: Um, AUH2O, what about this?
Peace agreement between BoS and CWAL
-CWAL shall stop all raids on Firaxis, and stop listening to Firaxis conversations.
-CWAL shall respect BoS and Firaxis borders
-CWAL shall pay 5 dollars for expenses occured by BoS in coming war
-CWAL shall stop asserting that Firaxis is done with SMAC
These seem fair to me.
Imran Siddiqui
Patriot
AUH20 posted 11-29-98 08:25 PM ET
Scene:BoS Headquarters, main airstrip
Flight Control: The Finance Minister's ship is landing now. OHMIGOD what the hell is he doing????
Plane:FWOOOOMMMM!! BANG BANG! SCREEEECHH! THUD
Au, scrambling out of plane: Whoo-hey, that was some landing.
Flight Controller: I really wish you would go lower on...
Au:Hey, that's exactly what I told Reagan about the capital gains tax in '85! BWAHAHAHAHA!

Flight Controller:Ah, yes Dr. H2O. Should I take your luggage now?
Au:I, um, left most it on the Raptor. And I accidently sent the budget through my propellers, but don't worry, I have a back-up copy hidden away at home.
Flight Contoller kay...No luggage then?
Au:Nope. Now if you don't mind I'll be going now.
_____________________________________________
Setting:BoS International Airport, Parking Lot
AuH2O is climbing into his car when infantry come pouring past, heading towards New Jersey.
Au:NIMadier General, NIMadier General, what are you doing?
YYYH: Can't talk now, damn-it minister.
Au h, sorry, man. Well would you tell your APC's not to run over my Beamer? I just bought it...
YYYH: FINE!
Au:Thanks, man.
Imran Siddiqui posted 11-29-98 08:30 PM ET
Imran: 5 dollars!! We're Rich. No wait you're Rich.
YYYH: That I am, and you're Imran.
Imran: Well, yes. Ok, that is all.
YYYH: Wait, you called me from the front for that!!
Imran: Well, yes. Oh! Wait, here is a new prototype weapon, number 2394533453.433: The NIM-47.
YYYH: Wow! That is good news! Thanks Mr. President!
Imran: Sarcasm does not become you, NIMadier General, it's actually a good weapon!! Honest, I swear!
YYYH: Ok, I'll give it a go.
Imran: Thank you!
YYYH: Sarcasm does not become you.
Imran Siddiqui
Patriot
AUH20 posted 11-29-98 08:35 PM ET
Setting: Imran and YYYH's meeting place
Suddenly the phone rings
Au:Yo
YYYH:Yo
Au:Yo
YYYH:Hey
Au:New secret weapon, hm? How much is that gonna cost? I can transfer the money from the EPA's enforcement fund, all of it, and I'm sure a few welfare reciepents can go get a job at McDonald's, but remember, if the budget deficit is too high, or if taxes get too high, it's my ass which is on the line.
YYYH: Of course, I'm very concerned about you...
Au: Sarcasm does not become you. I have to run now. An APC is running over my car.
Imran Siddiqui posted 11-29-98 09:14 PM ET
Disclaimer: The BoS is fully funded by an unknown secret group. They are.. Wait, your trying to trick me! Anyway, we pay no taxes, have no welfare, we just have technology and military payed for by this source. That is all.
Imran Siddiqui posted 11-29-98 09:16 PM ET
Btw, AUH2O, sarcasm does not become you [don't ask me, I just make up slogans].
AUH20 posted 11-29-98 09:19 PM ET
Well, yes, Imran, but what of our role as the Shadow Government for...never mind, I've said to much. But they DO have welfare. Anyway, back to the story.
_____________________________________________
Setting: New York City
Finance Minister AuH2O is driving around New York City
Radio: President Clinton announced today he would...
Au:It better be something in accordance with the new Shadow Deal...Wait!!! A division of CWALers! They're jay-walking! And it's open season! Commence Operation Taxi Driver!
CWALers:ACK! It's a nutty car driver! Look out!
Car:SQUISH!
Au:Ah, nothing like driving down anti-Firaxis pedestrians. Oh, hey Rudy! *SWERVE* CRASH! Damn. Avis is NOT going to be happy.
Imran Siddiqui posted 11-29-98 09:24 PM ET
Avis!! You rented a car not specified by BoS to be friendly!! That's it. Yoink, theres your licence, you can get it back after completeing a 5000 question test on Quantum Physics of Car driving. Running over people is not BoS policy!
Imran Siddiqui
Patriot
AUH20 posted 11-29-98 09:29 PM ET
My license? How'm I gonna drive to cabinet meetings? And Avis was bought out by the Morgan Conglomerate, which I was COO at before entering the public sector, so that counts as friendly, doesn't it? And YOUR general ran over my car before, so what the hell wasn't I supposed to do? And I was acting as, um, a private citizen, that's it, not as a BoS representative.
Yo_Yo_Yo_Hey posted 11-29-98 09:36 PM ET
YYYH: Actually it is BoS policy to run people down with our cars
(pulls out a thick group of papers)
YYYH: (pointing to a spot) You see right here, Section A subsection D....
Imran: SHUTUP!! That's top secret
(Imran rips the thick papers out of YYYH's hand)
Imran: We're supposed to seem good to everyone!
YYYH: Oh yeah of course, now if you please. I have to run some more civilians over.........I mean drive my tanks to Hunt Valley! BYE!
Your faithful & hell-bent NIMadier general,
YYYH
Imran Siddiqui posted 11-29-98 09:46 PM ET
Wait, I didn't write that in the Constitution!! We are a good club!! No running over anyone, anymore. Executive order!! Except if they are on the battlefield, then it is OK.
AUH20 posted 11-29-98 11:22 PM ET
Oh, okay Imran.

_____________________________________________
Scene: Battlefield, CWAL vs. BoS
AuH2O drives up in his newly repaired Beamer and starts running over CWALers.
Au IE! DIE! We'll teach you to bug Firaxis! DIE!!!!!!!! Now I'm outta here.
AuH2O's Beamer flies off into the sunset.
AUH20 posted 11-30-98 01:45 AM ET
DAMN SMILIES!
Anyway, Imran, couldn't you argue that New York City is a perennial battlefield?
Jay posted 11-30-98 04:04 AM ET
( BoS Command Cruiser Raptor)
Talon: Hmm... Jay, is the flak battery in O2aC already wiped out?
Jay: Yes sir.
Talon: What about Jolt at Cd9b?
Jay: Jolt? Where? CHARGE!
Talon: Uh-huh...
( Five minutes later)
Targetting Computer: Target identfied as a CWAL member. Target locked.
Jay: Hehehe... Wait. That ain't Jolt. It's Freerunner. Whatever. ( presses the trigger)
Both of the MPF's rocket guns start firing and about 50 or so rockets fly down.
Jay: Damn. Missed. Well, next time I'll bring in some napalm bombs.
Yo_Yo_Yo_Hey posted 11-30-98 12:54 PM ET
Ahh, good old-fashioned napalm. I thought in this new age of war, everyone would forget about napalm. I'm glad one of you yung 'uns knows about napalm.
To quote that guy from Apocalypse Now(his name escapes me):
"There's nothing like the smell of napalm in the morning! That smell, that gasoline smell, smells like........victory!"
Your faithful & hell-bent NIMadier general,
YYYH
Imran Siddiqui posted 11-30-98 04:06 PM ET
CWAL HV - IHOP
Fjorxc: So, we'll crush them but utilizing Plan Smelly Toe Fungus, right?
Exile: Right. Then we can march though and take Firaxis hostage. MWAHAHAHA.
Imran, crouched in a vent, mumbles to himself: But thats a violation of the NIM Accords, chemical weapons.
Fjorxc and Exile both left the room, laughing madly, after which, Imran came into the plan room of the IHOP. He came across a locker which was recently visited by Fjorxc.
Imran: The plans are in here... Shoot its locked!
Imran then uses the powers of the force (and a pin) to unlock the locker. The plans are his.
Imran: Alright, time to book.
Just at that time, CWAL guards come into the Plan Room.
Guard 1: What the Hell? Set Blasters to Kill, radio Fjorxc, we got BoS's President!
Imran: You just think you do! Look I've disappeared [Imran waves hand over guard's face]
Guard 1: Where'd he go?! Search everywhere!
While searching around the room, the guards left the front door open, and Imran strolled out and jumped into the anti-grav flyer come to recieve him.
Pilot: Did you get them, sir?
Imran: Of course, now lets go, before the realize something is wrong.
Pilot: Yes, Sir.
Imran Siddiqui
Patriot

DarkLight posted 11-30-98 06:30 PM ET
CWAL has guards? I didn't know that. Must have been some bums Forks hired off the street to guard the coffee in the kitchen...
Fjorxc: Umm... Bye-bye...
(Fjorxc runs off, followed by several bums demanding pay.)
Fjorxc the Maniac posted 11-30-98 07:22 PM ET
Huh? That's odd, I thought most of CWAL with the exception of Aura and Sofielisk were on the Phoenix... about when is this taking place, exactly?
Hmm...I smell certain advantages to having a time-travelling starship...
Fjorxc the Maniac(CWAL Hunt Valley)
May the Fjorxc be with you and a happy new year.
"There is one thing that all ancient civilizations, both in their leadership and mythology, have in common. Incest."
Imran Siddiqui posted 12-01-98 04:31 PM ET
Time Travel!! General YYYH, invest leaks in the BoS. That's our project, and its almost completed as well.
Imran turns to the right
Imran: Ensign, how is Project C coming along?
Ensign: You mean the super light speed drive...?
Imran: Yes! You moron this isn't a secure conversation.
Ensign: Sorry, Umm... RojectPay C siay omingcay ellway.
Imran: Like no one knows Pig Latin you reject!
Imran Siddiqui
Patriot
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Author	Topic: Operation Falling Water:pt. 1
Talon	posted 11-29-98 01:55 PM ET DisclaimerThis story can only be continued by a member,citizen,monk (or whatever we're calling ourselves) from the Brotherhood of Sid. Any changes to this storyline will be ignored. Feel free to post reactions. --------------------------------------------- -High Security meeting room, Sub-sub-sub-section 22D,BoS Headquarters Imran Siddiqui, newly elected head of the Brotherhood of Sid convenes a secret meeting with his top military officers YYYH and Talon. Imran:Yo YYYH:Yo Imran:Yo YYYH:Hey! Talon:Um...guys? Imran:We're trying to have a conversation here! YYYH:Yea! couldn't you tell? Talon: uhh...sorry Imran:Before I was so rudely interrupted, i was going to tell you the reason for the meeting. Talon:Like what? YYYH: You know the utter elimination of CWAL HV? Talon: Oh yeah I knew that! YYYH: Whatever Tal. Anyways Imran, what's on tap for today? Imran: we've got Bud Light,Michelob,and some Labbats Blue we found in DJRRebel's office. YYYH:That sounds good but I meant what's the plan? Imran: That's the reason for the meeting. We need a plan. Any Ideas? Talon:I could send in my planes and bomb them relentlessly. YYYH: Or send in the blue alpacas named Bob to create some havoc and them use NIM8 on the survivors. Imran: None of those sound good. How about we check the BoS computer archives. (Imran scans through the search results) Here's something. It was hidden deep inside BoS archive II. It's something called Operation Falling Water(wave two) YYYH: Hey that's my plan. Talon: Yeah I remember looking over a preliminary plan for that. Imran: Alright we use O.F.W. I'm sending the details to you now. Imran Out. --------------------------------------------- -Control Room,Flying Fortress"Raptor"- Major Briggs:Here are the orders sir. Talon: Let me see them (Talon reads them over) Looks all in order. Major, change course to GLCOMET1 and patch me through to Lt.Commanders Jay and Titans Bane. Major Briggs:Yes sir, headed for GLCOMET1, Jay and Titans Bane are online. Jay:Sir? Talon:Jay, we have received orders to attack CWAL HV, prep Alpha and Delta squadrons for action and then report back to me. Jay: Roger that. Jay Out. Talon:Titans Bane where the hell have you been? Titans Bane:I don't know thw last few days have been a blur. Talon:Well get your **** together and report to NIMandier general YYYH for asignment. I'll meet you at GLCOMET1, move Czar1 to BEAGLE location. Titans Bane: Roger that sir Talon: Talon Out. (Talon walks to his stateroom for some much needed rest) --------------------------------------------- Once again replies are welcome. YYYH and Imran please add your own stories to this one. -Talon Cmr. of the BoS Airforce Member?, Citizen?, Monk? of the BoS
Dark Nexus	posted 11-29-98 03:18 PM ET Nice. But for a second, I thought you were a shotgun-wielding, coffee-making brain in a jar............ Dark Nexus "Sanity is calming, but madness is more interesting."
DarkLight	posted 11-29-98 03:58 PM ET Decent so far, but a slight bit of advice: Try putting spaces in between lines of dialogue. It make sit much easier to read.
Imran Siddiqui	posted 11-29-98 08:02 PM ET Main operation room - BoS Headquarters Imran: Roy (the computer), Please give me some scematics on the new plans. Roy: Wrrrrr... [Paper shooting out] Imran stoops over an picks up the pages. Imran: 200 pages!! Talon goes a little overboard at time doesn't he. Roy: That's not all, I ran out of paper. I'm on page 200 of 1000. Imran: What?! Ok, Ok, I'll throw out pages 2 to 999, it probably still be the same. I don't know why Talon decided to put every ones name in the damn scematics. Imran turns to a man in blue. Imran: Messenger, send this copy over to the NIMadier General, take you fastest rocket car! Messenger: Yes, sir! The Messenger disappears from view. Imran: Get the NIMadier General on the phone! Soldier: He's on the can, sir. Imran: What, how do know that, do have contact to the front lines? Solider: No, sir, he's still here. Imran: Oh, for the love of God, I just sent a messenger out to... God Damn it!! YYYH: Yes, sir, I heard you wanted me. Imran: Um, yes, we are to attck here [Imran points to the map] and here. Initiate Operation Patton, join Operation Falling Water, after it is done. YYYH: Sir, yes, sir! Imran: Oh, by the way, if a messenger somes for you, take the scematics. YYYH: But I already have them. Imran: Just take them, and say thank you. YYYH: Ok chief, your call. Imran: Dismissed! ---------------------------------------- AUH2O: I almost have the terms ready, Mr. President Imran: Good, good, let me see them when your through AUH2O: No problem, sir. Imran Siddiqui Patriot
AUH20	posted 11-29-98 08:12 PM ET AUH20 wanders into the room with a suitcase. he puts the case down, and pulls out several pieces of paper. Au kay, guys, here's the terms of surrender for CWAL. Imran:I wish you wouldn't just barge in like that, Dr. H2O. Au h, sorry. YYYH:EPA---Enforcement $0.33? Au ops, wrong ministry. Sorry, it's not easy holding two upper-echelon jobs at once. Here. And do me a favor, don't show that to any of the Gaian members of the Brotherhood, okay? YYYH:These are very-interesting... Au: I'll read them for the full house. We, the members of Can't Wait Any Longer(CWAL) hereby submit to the following terms and conditions set forth by the Brotherhood of Sid(BoS). Item #1: All CWAL members shall henceforth wear toga's bearing the Firaxis logo on the back and the word's "Sid is a Genius." or "Firaxis knows when the hell to release games." Item #2: The leaders of CWAL shall be recquired to take jobs as janitors at Firaxis headquarters, and shall volunteer for latrine duty whenever need be. Item #3a: CWAL shall pay reperations to be determined at a later date for Firaxis for there raids against them. Item #3b: CWAL shall pay reperations to be determined at a later date to SMACers for delays caused by Firaxis having to defend against raids. Au:I'd welcome addenda. That's just a rough draft. Of course, if Yo's plan works, there won't be much time for addenda! BWAHAHA! Imran:Uh...Au. Au:Yes? Imran:Your glasses fell of during the maniacal laugh again. Au amn. AuH2O then puts his glasses back on, and walks out of the room trying to preserve what little dignity he has left, picking up his copy of the budget on his way out.
AUH20	posted 11-29-98 08:14 PM ET Oh, **** I forgot about the new faces. Here's a guide: Okay Oh Oops Damn
Yo_Yo_Yo_Hey	posted 11-29-98 08:15 PM ET (A rocket car pulls up) Messenger: NIMadier general, NIMadier general!! YYYH: What do ya want!?!?! Messenger: (heavy breathing) Sir, I have the schematics here! YYYH: Schematics, what?? Give me those (rips them out of the messengers hand) YYYH: Now, off with ye! Colonel K'nownothing: (whispering) Thank you, thank you! YYYH: Oh yeah, thank you messenger! Messenger: Any time sir! (The messenger gets into the rocket car & drives off) YYYH: ****in idiots in my army.....Colonel! How's the Salvation Army re-education coming? Colonel K'nownothing: Well, sir it's goin' along ok, just that they still think they should give. YYYH: Pchh, giving. You know how I feel about giving! K;nownothing: Yes I do, it's your fault my wife & kids are starving in a box!! YYYH: SHUTUP! Initiate Operation Patton now. You know what to do. K'nownothing: Yes sir! (The tanks all mobilize & drive towards Ohio, as the infantry marches to New Jersey) Your faithful & hell-bent NIMadier general, YYYH
Imran Siddiqui	posted 11-29-98 08:25 PM ET Imran: Um, AUH2O, what about this? Peace agreement between BoS and CWAL -CWAL shall stop all raids on Firaxis, and stop listening to Firaxis conversations. -CWAL shall respect BoS and Firaxis borders -CWAL shall pay 5 dollars for expenses occured by BoS in coming war -CWAL shall stop asserting that Firaxis is done with SMAC These seem fair to me. Imran Siddiqui Patriot
AUH20	posted 11-29-98 08:25 PM ET Scene:BoS Headquarters, main airstrip Flight Control: The Finance Minister's ship is landing now. OHMIGOD what the hell is he doing???? Plane:FWOOOOMMMM!! BANG BANG! SCREEEECHH! THUD Au, scrambling out of plane: Whoo-hey, that was some landing. Flight Controller: I really wish you would go lower on... Au:Hey, that's exactly what I told Reagan about the capital gains tax in '85! BWAHAHAHAHA! Flight Controller:Ah, yes Dr. H2O. Should I take your luggage now? Au:I, um, left most it on the Raptor. And I accidently sent the budget through my propellers, but don't worry, I have a back-up copy hidden away at home. Flight Contoller kay...No luggage then? Au:Nope. Now if you don't mind I'll be going now. _____________________________________________ Setting:BoS International Airport, Parking Lot AuH2O is climbing into his car when infantry come pouring past, heading towards New Jersey. Au:NIMadier General, NIMadier General, what are you doing? YYYH: Can't talk now, damn-it minister. Au h, sorry, man. Well would you tell your APC's not to run over my Beamer? I just bought it... YYYH: FINE! Au:Thanks, man.
Imran Siddiqui	posted 11-29-98 08:30 PM ET Imran: 5 dollars!! We're Rich. No wait you're Rich. YYYH: That I am, and you're Imran. Imran: Well, yes. Ok, that is all. YYYH: Wait, you called me from the front for that!! Imran: Well, yes. Oh! Wait, here is a new prototype weapon, number 2394533453.433: The NIM-47. YYYH: Wow! That is good news! Thanks Mr. President! Imran: Sarcasm does not become you, NIMadier General, it's actually a good weapon!! Honest, I swear! YYYH: Ok, I'll give it a go. Imran: Thank you! YYYH: Sarcasm does not become you. Imran Siddiqui Patriot
AUH20	posted 11-29-98 08:35 PM ET Setting: Imran and YYYH's meeting place Suddenly the phone rings Au:Yo YYYH:Yo Au:Yo YYYH:Hey Au:New secret weapon, hm? How much is that gonna cost? I can transfer the money from the EPA's enforcement fund, all of it, and I'm sure a few welfare reciepents can go get a job at McDonald's, but remember, if the budget deficit is too high, or if taxes get too high, it's my ass which is on the line. YYYH: Of course, I'm very concerned about you... Au: Sarcasm does not become you. I have to run now. An APC is running over my car.
Imran Siddiqui	posted 11-29-98 09:14 PM ET Disclaimer: The BoS is fully funded by an unknown secret group. They are.. Wait, your trying to trick me! Anyway, we pay no taxes, have no welfare, we just have technology and military payed for by this source. That is all.
Imran Siddiqui	posted 11-29-98 09:16 PM ET Btw, AUH2O, sarcasm does not become you [don't ask me, I just make up slogans].
AUH20	posted 11-29-98 09:19 PM ET Well, yes, Imran, but what of our role as the Shadow Government for...never mind, I've said to much. But they DO have welfare. Anyway, back to the story. _____________________________________________ Setting: New York City Finance Minister AuH2O is driving around New York City Radio: President Clinton announced today he would... Au:It better be something in accordance with the new Shadow Deal...Wait!!! A division of CWALers! They're jay-walking! And it's open season! Commence Operation Taxi Driver! CWALers:ACK! It's a nutty car driver! Look out! Car:SQUISH! Au:Ah, nothing like driving down anti-Firaxis pedestrians. Oh, hey Rudy! SWERVE CRASH! Damn. Avis is NOT going to be happy.
Imran Siddiqui	posted 11-29-98 09:24 PM ET Avis!! You rented a car not specified by BoS to be friendly!! That's it. Yoink, theres your licence, you can get it back after completeing a 5000 question test on Quantum Physics of Car driving. Running over people is not BoS policy! Imran Siddiqui Patriot
AUH20	posted 11-29-98 09:29 PM ET My license? How'm I gonna drive to cabinet meetings? And Avis was bought out by the Morgan Conglomerate, which I was COO at before entering the public sector, so that counts as friendly, doesn't it? And YOUR general ran over my car before, so what the hell wasn't I supposed to do? And I was acting as, um, a private citizen, that's it, not as a BoS representative.
Yo_Yo_Yo_Hey	posted 11-29-98 09:36 PM ET YYYH: Actually it is BoS policy to run people down with our cars (pulls out a thick group of papers) YYYH: (pointing to a spot) You see right here, Section A subsection D.... Imran: SHUTUP!! That's top secret (Imran rips the thick papers out of YYYH's hand) Imran: We're supposed to seem good to everyone! YYYH: Oh yeah of course, now if you please. I have to run some more civilians over.........I mean drive my tanks to Hunt Valley! BYE! Your faithful & hell-bent NIMadier general, YYYH
Imran Siddiqui	posted 11-29-98 09:46 PM ET Wait, I didn't write that in the Constitution!! We are a good club!! No running over anyone, anymore. Executive order!! Except if they are on the battlefield, then it is OK.
AUH20	posted 11-29-98 11:22 PM ET Oh, okay Imran. _____________________________________________ Scene: Battlefield, CWAL vs. BoS AuH2O drives up in his newly repaired Beamer and starts running over CWALers. Au IE! DIE! We'll teach you to bug Firaxis! DIE!!!!!!!! Now I'm outta here. AuH2O's Beamer flies off into the sunset.
AUH20	posted 11-30-98 01:45 AM ET DAMN SMILIES! Anyway, Imran, couldn't you argue that New York City is a perennial battlefield?
Jay	posted 11-30-98 04:04 AM ET ( BoS Command Cruiser Raptor) Talon: Hmm... Jay, is the flak battery in O2aC already wiped out? Jay: Yes sir. Talon: What about Jolt at Cd9b? Jay: Jolt? Where? CHARGE! Talon: Uh-huh... ( Five minutes later) Targetting Computer: Target identfied as a CWAL member. Target locked. Jay: Hehehe... Wait. That ain't Jolt. It's Freerunner. Whatever. ( presses the trigger) Both of the MPF's rocket guns start firing and about 50 or so rockets fly down. Jay: Damn. Missed. Well, next time I'll bring in some napalm bombs.
Yo_Yo_Yo_Hey	posted 11-30-98 12:54 PM ET Ahh, good old-fashioned napalm. I thought in this new age of war, everyone would forget about napalm. I'm glad one of you yung 'uns knows about napalm. To quote that guy from Apocalypse Now(his name escapes me): "There's nothing like the smell of napalm in the morning! That smell, that gasoline smell, smells like........victory!" Your faithful & hell-bent NIMadier general, YYYH
Imran Siddiqui	posted 11-30-98 04:06 PM ET CWAL HV - IHOP Fjorxc: So, we'll crush them but utilizing Plan Smelly Toe Fungus, right? Exile: Right. Then we can march though and take Firaxis hostage. MWAHAHAHA. Imran, crouched in a vent, mumbles to himself: But thats a violation of the NIM Accords, chemical weapons. Fjorxc and Exile both left the room, laughing madly, after which, Imran came into the plan room of the IHOP. He came across a locker which was recently visited by Fjorxc. Imran: The plans are in here... Shoot its locked! Imran then uses the powers of the force (and a pin) to unlock the locker. The plans are his. Imran: Alright, time to book. Just at that time, CWAL guards come into the Plan Room. Guard 1: What the Hell? Set Blasters to Kill, radio Fjorxc, we got BoS's President! Imran: You just think you do! Look I've disappeared [Imran waves hand over guard's face] Guard 1: Where'd he go?! Search everywhere! While searching around the room, the guards left the front door open, and Imran strolled out and jumped into the anti-grav flyer come to recieve him. Pilot: Did you get them, sir? Imran: Of course, now lets go, before the realize something is wrong. Pilot: Yes, Sir. Imran Siddiqui Patriot
DarkLight	posted 11-30-98 06:30 PM ET CWAL has guards? I didn't know that. Must have been some bums Forks hired off the street to guard the coffee in the kitchen... Fjorxc: Umm... Bye-bye... (Fjorxc runs off, followed by several bums demanding pay.)
Fjorxc the Maniac	posted 11-30-98 07:22 PM ET Huh? That's odd, I thought most of CWAL with the exception of Aura and Sofielisk were on the Phoenix... about when is this taking place, exactly? Hmm...I smell certain advantages to having a time-travelling starship... Fjorxc the Maniac(CWAL Hunt Valley) May the Fjorxc be with you and a happy new year. "There is one thing that all ancient civilizations, both in their leadership and mythology, have in common. Incest."
Imran Siddiqui	posted 12-01-98 04:31 PM ET Time Travel!! General YYYH, invest leaks in the BoS. That's our project, and its almost completed as well. Imran turns to the right Imran: Ensign, how is Project C coming along? Ensign: You mean the super light speed drive...? Imran: Yes! You moron this isn't a secure conversation. Ensign: Sorry, Umm... RojectPay C siay omingcay ellway. Imran: Like no one knows Pig Latin you reject! Imran Siddiqui Patriot