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Author Topic:   The I Club XXXVI: Naboo
Exile posted 05-27-99 08:39 AM ET   Click Here to See the Profile for Exile   Click Here to Email Exile  
Allright guys, Mos Eisely isn't the best place to store our valuables while we party in the I Club...Soooooooo, let's move to a safer spot, I.E. Naboo, just step through the Psi Gate or jump into your ship.

Unidentified I Cluber: Wait a minuites, won't people mind if we thrash that planet?

Exile: No, they have been...Relocated, for the moment

(flash to a planet somewhere, the Gungans and the Nabooians have been moved there)

So....who's comming?

MikeH II posted 05-27-99 09:08 AM ET     Click Here to See the Profile for MikeH II  Click Here to Email MikeH II     
MikeH hangs up a new sign:

No plot secrets for Phantom Menace allowed before MikeH sees the film!

Fjorxc the Maniac posted 05-27-99 09:54 AM ET     Click Here to See the Profile for Fjorxc the Maniac  Click Here to Email Fjorxc the Maniac     
Star Wars? Bah. I don't need to have seen Star Wars to post in here.

A rift opens in the middle of the I Club. Fjorxc walks out, wearing his newly trademark set of Glitter Boy power armor. He walks over to the bar and chugs a few Nerve Staplers.


Fjorxc the Maniac
Unwashed Village Idiot,
Wanderer,
CWALer,
8th Canadian Faction of Humanity.

"So watch out... Lazlo Panaplex!

Fjorxc the Maniac posted 05-27-99 09:56 AM ET     Click Here to See the Profile for Fjorxc the Maniac  Click Here to Email Fjorxc the Maniac     
BTW, what kind of name is Naboo, anyway? Sounds a little '80s-cartoon-derivative to me. Ah well. It's picture time.

Fjorxc the Maniac
Unwashed Village Idiot,
Wanderer,
CWALer,
8th Canadian Faction of Humanity.

Jay posted 05-27-99 01:35 PM ET     Click Here to See the Profile for Jay  Click Here to Email Jay     
Naboo? From the Phantom Menace? Star wars stuff?
JohnIII posted 05-27-99 01:47 PM ET     Click Here to See the Profile for JohnIII  Click Here to Email JohnIII     
No. A completely different Naboo...
John III
Hugo Rune posted 05-27-99 03:46 PM ET     Click Here to See the Profile for Hugo Rune  Click Here to Email Hugo Rune     
Random Forum Idiot: Ooh, look, a "no TPM plot details" sign. Well, this is what happens. There are these jedi's, see...

He is shot by one of the forbidden weapons.

Frodo83 posted 05-27-99 09:11 PM ET     Click Here to See the Profile for Frodo83  Click Here to Email Frodo83     
Frodo, thanks to some bizarre plot twist, can only speak lines from THE MOVIE.

Frodo: I have decided to go back to Naboo.

He steps through the Psi Gate.

SnowFire posted 05-27-99 10:15 PM ET     Click Here to See the Profile for SnowFire  Click Here to Email SnowFire     
SnowFire sits in Mos Eisly.

SnowFire: Where have all the, forumers gone. Doot doo doo, doo-doo, doot.

The Nice Greedo in the Alternate SW Universe created in the Previous I Club: Quick! To the Millenium Falcon!

SnowFire: Um, why?

TN Greedo itASWUciICXXXV: Um... I don't know.

SnowFire: Oh well. Let's get on it anyway, and head for Naboo.

Later...

Han Solo: The hyperdrive kicked out!

C3P0: Sir, the odds of navigating an asteroid field are 735 to 1!

Obi-Wan Kenobi: I sense a disturbance in the Force. What is thy name?

Darth Vader: When you left Scotland, I was but a thane. Now I am the master! (Huh?)

Emperor Palpatine: I think it is best to accept Federation control for now.

Chancellor Gowron: No! The Klignons will never admit defeat!

SnowFire, newly in touch with his godly powers after the ascension of Victor, decides simply to teleport to Naboo instead...

Jar Jar Binks: Mesa namesa Jar Jar Binks!

SnowFire considers teleporting back, but decides simply to teleport Jar Jar to Mos Espa, where he can be killed by nasty aliens.

Exile posted 05-28-99 10:26 AM ET     Click Here to See the Profile for Exile  Click Here to Email Exile     
(A large ammount of money had been payed out by a mysterious Protoss to see that nothing mysterious happens to a mysterious group of mysteriously shrouded mystery people)

Alien 1: Are you sure we should have made this bargain? I'm sure you remember what happened when we lent ourselves out the last time

Alien 2: Well, this one isn't some creep in a cloak

A1: Ah, allright then, what did he want us to hold?

A2: a queen, her entourage, and some alien named Jar Jar

A1: Allright then (to a hologram of the mysterious Protoss) When can we expect payment?

MP: You will recieve it upon the end of this I Club, when all I entrust to you are alive

A1: I see.....

=============================================

Exile
"Now we can't have people killing the one who is to step in our turd can we?"

Victor Galis posted 05-28-99 08:15 PM ET     Click Here to See the Profile for Victor Galis  Click Here to Email Victor Galis     
Victor teleports in throught the Psi Gate, and notices all the splendor of the area...

Victor: I want the palace maintained as is.
Exile: Why?
Victor: That way when I take over the galaxy I will have a ready-built over-luxurious palace. I can use the money it saves me to buy ships. The ExileMart still sells ships right?
Exile: Yes, why do you... (glances at palace and dreams how much money Victor will pay him for ships.)

Exile posted 05-28-99 08:31 PM ET     Click Here to See the Profile for Exile  Click Here to Email Exile     
(Later that day, at the Theed Palace Hanger conviniently placed at the Nabooian capital of Theed)

Exile: Allright, just load those N-1 fighters into the crates, we need to smuggle them out tonight

(Unbeknownst to the other I Clubbers, Exile has smuggled out any and all weapons to secret drop-off sites in the galaxy to be picked up after the I Club....)

(And the N-1's were smuggled off to Exile's personal Hanger in his hidden storage point)

SnowFire posted 05-30-99 09:08 AM ET     Click Here to See the Profile for SnowFire  Click Here to Email SnowFire     
SnowFire sets up a nice fire going at a steady burn in the Naboo Campground.

"Hey, come on everybody! We're going to have a nice Jar-Jar-B-Q!"

Ah yes... "Gunguns roasting on an open fire." Some of my favorite songs.

Exile posted 05-30-99 10:36 AM ET     Click Here to See the Profile for Exile  Click Here to Email Exile     
(Destroyer Droids roll tdown the streets of Theed, crushing the odd Nabooian or breaking a few sentimental possesions as they roll towards the Naboo Campgrounds)

{Later that day, Naboo Campgrounds)

Destroyer Droid 1: Are you Snow-Fire?

SnowFire: Yes, why?

DD 2: You are under arrest

SnowFire: Huh? What for?

DD 3: Burning things illegaly and eating a sentient species, your going away for a loooong time

SnowFire: Nooooooooooo!!!(is dragged away by the DD's)

(yes there is a new law against eating sentient species, killing a sentient species(or member of) within the duration of the I Club, and roasting or otherwise cooking a sentient species (or member of) in the I Club)

Hugo Rune posted 05-30-99 01:10 PM ET     Click Here to See the Profile for Hugo Rune  Click Here to Email Hugo Rune     
Hugo: Does that mean I can't eat this delicious leg of Azugal that... I Am... Holding... in my... LOOK BEHIND YOU, A THREE-HEADED MONKEY!

He is taken away by the Guards.

SnowFire posted 05-30-99 02:59 PM ET     Click Here to See the Profile for SnowFire  Click Here to Email SnowFire     
SnowFire: Um, Mr. Droid, do you realize that the Gunguns are your enemies?

Droid: Erm... yes.

SnowFire: And the enemy of your enemy is your friend, right?

Droid: Um... what about Iran vs. Iraq in 1980?

SnowFire: Shut up. So, isn't the enemy of your enemy your friend?

Droid: Well, I guess so.

SnowFire: So, as a friend-to-friend thing, could you hand me that insignifcant piece of metal?

Droid: Um... okay.

SnowFire activates the lightsabre, and annihlates the droid and his helper droids easily.

SnowFire: And that is why you shouldn't contract battle-droid making out to the lowest bidder.

Fjorxc the Maniac posted 05-30-99 03:26 PM ET     Click Here to See the Profile for Fjorxc the Maniac  Click Here to Email Fjorxc the Maniac     
Fjorxc the Maniac posted 05-30-99 03:29 PM ET     Click Here to See the Profile for Fjorxc the Maniac  Click Here to Email Fjorxc the Maniac     
Cool! I screwed it up.


Do you want Star Wars spoilers? Do you? Well, do you? I don't have time to sit around here all day. If you want them, keep watching. If not, avert your eyes. There. Anyway, there are these two Jedis, and they kill a bunch of people, and go to Tatooine. Enjoy it? I did.

Fjorxc the Maniac posted 05-30-99 03:29 PM ET     Click Here to See the Profile for Fjorxc the Maniac  Click Here to Email Fjorxc the Maniac     
Hmm... I wonder how I did that?
1212 posted 05-30-99 06:15 PM ET     Click Here to See the Profile for 1212  Click Here to Email 1212     
STAR WARS SUCKS BY THE FACT IT IS ASSOCIATED WITH THE PHANTOM MENACE

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